I am terrified of heights. I wasn't when I was younger but since having Summer I have developed many fears, some even irrational. Many, if not all women go through postpartum and I thought this was largely due to that. It's been 4 years though and I'm still finding it incredibly hard to step out of my balcony to hang the laundry or look out the window while the airplane takes off. I don't think it's a crippling fear but it's got me a little more cautious than normal where my daughter is concerned.
The weather in Dubai has changed and for the last few days I started opening the balcony door to let the nice cool breeze in. I did the same this afternoon when I saw the setting sun and the gorgeous backdrop it gave the vast wilderness. I stepped out, felt the wind on my face and just took it all in. And for a brief moment there, I was oblivious to my fear. In fact, all the anxious thoughts and worries from yesterday and the days before seemed to fade away as I took the time to just be present.
My pleasant reverie was interrupted shortly when I heard Summer's tiny voice behind me, hesitant but hopeful that I'd let her come out and join me in her most forbidden area of the flat. I smiled and slowly took her to sit on my lap as I continued to appreciate the afternoon that it was.
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